Not long after my previous post about meeting the talent manager at the large casting event in Poughkeepsie, I submitted all of my materials (headshot, resume, and current reel) for his consideration. He responded back to me that he is looking for more clips of other work I have done, namely commercials but any other work on bigger projects would do.
At first, I was a little crushed due to the fact that I have the hardest time booking those types of roles as the production companies won’t look my way without representation. It’s the reason why I had to attend such a large audition to begin with. That open call was the only way (at this point in time) for me to have a chance at a speaking part in a major feature film or television production.
However, I’m going to find a way to get into something. Even though I’m not signed with this particular manager, he did add me into the email chain dedicated to clients. So I may have a shot yet. I am being proactive about my search too. I updated my account with Backstage.com to remove any and all background work, removed live theatre work, student films, and promotional modeling. It is now hyperfocused on anything related to film, television, commercials, and industrial shoots (as they are speaking parts). This will probably work since I’m more specific about which roles I’ll take.
While it’s still not a guarantee that he will sign me even after all is said and done, the worst that could happen is the addition of credentials on my resume for someone who really wants to sign me. That being said, I have a good feeling that he will be my manager. Wish me luck!
(Source: Google Image Search)
Good grief this was a week for news, huh?!
I’m having a hard time focusing on a topic. Do I write my thoughts about the College Cheating Scandal? Bryan Singer’s long overdue firing from directing ‘Red Sonja’? How about the latest scandal involving Brett Ratner, the CEO of Warner Bros. and the actress Charlotte Kirk?
And that was only a small handful of what happened this week.
I can’t blame this Mercury Retrograde because I don’t believe in it. Truthfully I think this planet and everyone on it has been caught up in a vortex of bizarre behavior since 2015. With it being 2019 I think we are experiencing the worst of the vortex and soon we will be out of it (if we all survive that is.)
Until then, I’m just going to keep my nose to the grindstone and mind my business. This is too much.
Some information was just revealed to me not that long ago. Another case of student harassment by a different professor. While I was not affected by this person (they are one of my professors, but I’m not a target of their harassment) several of my classmates were, making it a much bigger problem than what I previously experienced with my case last year.
This complaint is still ongoing so I don’t want to lay out details just in case someone from the school may be following, but a person involved asked me advice on how to report and navigate the situation. I was happy to help because what is currently happening is NOT OK.
I think what infuriates me the most is the fact that although this is a different professor, it’s the same department. There are also rumblings about another separate professor who is also known for bullying which makes me wonder what the hell is going on in this school?! Another thing: the students are well aware that they are going to deal with this personality type (if you could call it that) in the field. So why do they have to encounter it in an educational institution? The one place where they are, and are supposed to be the most vulnerable?
Is it to discourage them from this business?
Is it to offer “tough love”?
Or is it that the leadership here feels emboldened to be the abusers they truly are?
The reason why I used the select meme above was for a good reason; I’m sick and tired of the dusty ass trope telling actors to develop thicker skin in order to survive this business. Trust me when I say this: we have thick skin. We are also well trained in discernment. We know when we are given constructive criticism or when it’s just plain disrespect. So the assumption that we are thin skinned is insulting. You know who’s thin skinned? Abusers.
(Taken last night when I walked into the house.)
I made it! It feels so good to be home too. Yes, things are finally calming down with school, but I still felt scattered and out of sorts. Landing on American soil not only rejuvenated my spirit, but calmed some of the anxiety I was feeling.
A couple of good things came out of my move to Ireland. 1) I’m down 20 lbs with 40 more to go. As long as I continue to work out while I’m home I should be able to shave off another 15 while I’m here. 2) I have a deeper appreciation for what I had back home. Things look less bleak and I’m ready to work my butt off as well.
I hope to post more now that I have a bit more time to work on my own projects. In the meantime, I’m going to rest.
(Source: Student Problems Facebook.)
One. More. Class.
Then I fly out on Tuesday morning back to the United States, and not a moment too soon. To say this semester kicked my ass is an understatement. Yes, it did improve, and so did I. However, the steps it took to get here were super treacherous. This trip back home will be a bit of a reprieve.
There are some updates I wanted to include in this post that I talked about in recent days:
• I’m no longer in the professor’s course that disrespected me in front of the entire class. I had to take the case up with the head of my major’s department and the academic dean to move me out of his class. I was moved to a different professor’s course where I’m ACTUALLY LEARNING my craft and it’s not being treated like a contestant for the teacher’s favorite student. The original professor still infuriates me. Not only in how he treated me, but the rumblings I’m hearing from how he is treating the other students. It also doesn’t help that he’s industry (working actor) too. If I ever have to work with him in a professional setting and he is disrespectful to me again, I hope I will be in a position of power by that point in time to call him out on his bullying instead of taking myself out of the situation like I did in class; which made me feel powerless. I suspect that is what he wanted all along. To make me feel powerless. He is a bully after all.
• The classmate finally came around and contributed the bare minimum to the group project and no need to “correct” my paper. Between my friend who also worked on the project calling them out their lack of effort and my email, it seems that kicked them in the pants enough to do some work. I hope to never have to work on another project with them ever again.
• The short film I worked on is coming together fast! We only shot it this past Wednesday and there is already a rough cut that was sent to the directors and the producer/writer of the production. Soon I hope to use some of the footage for my own show reel. Finally a friggin reel. It’s all coming together.
Aside from the updates, I managed to book another fit modeling gig back home and apply for some mini gigs. I’m also teaching at the dance studio this month starting next Thursday. My reprieve will be a bit busy, a bit profitable, and most of all it will be at home. I can’t wait!
(Source: Student Problems Facebook.)
It’s the last week of the semester, and, like always, there is fuckery afoot. There are a couple of projects that involve groups that I’m a part of, that are due this week. One of the projects in particular is close to bringing out “HR/Corporate Shamma.”
Why? Well, one individual in particular who has:
•Not consistently attended class.
•Not answer questions when asked on the group chat.
•Only wants to participate in the project according to their own terms and not the requirements of our professor. (Meaning they want to delegate all of the tasks to everyone else and do nothing themselves.)
Now has the absolute gall to send me an email requesting to forward all of my work to them, in order to make “corrections.”
They already showed their ass from the start when when they tried to accuse another student in the class of being flaky; when in fact the accuser is flaky as hell! Second of all…corrections? For what? They weren’t in class when all of the notes were taken and the professor knows I’m writing the paper. He has a keen idea on who’s been putting in work and who has not, so any “corrections” this person has to make is a desperate attempt to look like they did something.
Another point I want to add, is the background of this individual. Like me, they came from a previous profession (not corporate) before diving into Drama School. Which means they are also carrying a massive ego by thinking they are better than the other students here. But here’s the rub: the class we have this project for, is more suited to my previous industry than theirs. It’s the reason why I’m writing the report in the first place. Also, while my previous profession has been pivotal in how I navigate this industry, I’m not shitting on the other students for not having those skills. Instead I’m offering them up to be used to get us the best grade possible.
These skills are going to be dusted off, again, for the most scathing corporate email I can possibly write to this classmate. Including a corporate jargon way of conveying they are not getting my notes and go to hell.
I just had a long talk with my friend and classmate about memorization. Namely, we’re memorizing too many different texts. Since we have 10 classes, each class offers something different:
•A scene from an Irish play for Monday’s class.
•A piece of text from “The Tell Tale Heart” for the Tuesday morning class.
•A Shakespeare monologue for the Tuesday afternoon class.
•A scene from an Irish television show for Wednesday’s class.
•2 songs off book for vocal rep.
And that’s only this week.
Memorization is incredibly helpful, and over time, with enough training, I can memorize quickly. However, with stress, a varied schedule, and too many texts to learn, I’m far too scattered. With the way my brain works, I need to dedicate more time to learn a show or a piece of text than maybe the average person.
I pray to survive the semester with all of my texts in place. But I wish I could dedicate myself to one piece of text at a time.
(Source: Image Orca Pinterest.)
Is it possible for a scam to bring people together? In my case and many others, yes it did.
A “recruiter” messaged me a few weeks ago to tell of a a beauty campaign featuring diverse faces and body types for a campaign. I was wary of it at first, but I was also wary of a strange email sent to me about a film (MUDA) that turned out to be very real. So I asked for more information and they sent me an email regarding what the campaign is and what the contract looks like.
Before I agree to anything, I typically do research to find out more about the companies involved as well as the campaign. Shockingly these scammers did an incredible job at crossing their “T’s” and dotting their “I’s”. They provided real companies, real discount codes for their products, a genuine conference call with everyone that would be working on the shoot, as well as a real location as to where we would be staying. Unfortunately, but fortunately, the veil lifted for everyone soon after and it was revealed to be a scam.
The silver lining in all of it was that everyone scammed was on a group email and we all corresponded with each other after the big reveal to figure out how we can fight the scam and stay in touch. Now we are a community that follows each other on Instagram with the hopes that we will collaborate on projects in the future. It’s definitely possible: many of us are models, actors, recording artists, bloggers, and brand ambassadors. Movers and shakers in this industry that are making big things happen.
I’ve been fortunate enough to not be pulled into an elaborate scam that affects my safety or my finances. Those people are out there and it’s concerning that they would go to such lengths. Take this as a warning: do all of your research, ask questions, ask others that are involved, and if something doesn’t feel right in your gut, walk away.
I use this meme because it’s a process of appointments to get approval to work here. Especially with so many educational offerings from other theatre schools that my school does not offer in the slightest. Like:
•Casting and Auditions
•Stage Combat (primarily Rapier and Dagger work)
The Casting and Audition course is particularly interesting to me because that last audition I had back in December, I bombed completely. While my professors talk about auditions, they are not really touching on how difficult the process actually is. In fact many working actors in the thick of the industry say that auditioning is a skill of its own. Once you get a booking, doing the job is super easy.
The next beast to tame is the showreel. As I mentioned on a previous post, the hardest part of booking work has been a lack of a reel to present to potential casting agencies. Mainly due to not being cast in low budget or student films who are not paying me, but will compensate me with reel footage, but in order to be considered for a part, I must have a reel first…..
(Source: Twitter. Same, cute little dog, same.)
The workshop that is offering this is also teaching advanced techniques in working in film along with production of reel footage for me to use.
Of course, to cap it all off, there is another Stage Combat workshop that I want to take. Clearly I can’t get enough of this art, especially since I would be training in a brand new weapons category.
Two of the three courses are being paid for from my previous modeling jobs. The third I will need to find a job to pay for that course. Wish me luck!
(Source: somewhere on Twitter.)
I haven’t really talked too much about the apartment I was able to rent. Honestly my schedule doesn’t really permit for much of anything so it’s been difficult to stay consistent with this blog, but that complaint is for another time. However the time has come to not only talk about the apartment, but also why it’s forcing me to get in shape.
The apartment is really old and the bathroom is scary gross. The tenants are good people, so the lack of cleanliness is not a reflection on them. It has more to do with the fact that the last time the space was truly renovated was in the early 1900’s. I would fetch a guess that the bathroom has not had an update since the early 1990’s. There are all sorts of vermin crawling all over the place. I bought special storage bins for my clothing and toiletries so they wouldn’t have bugs in them. Plus I regularly check my suitcases and my bed to make sure no critters have crawled in them. It’s bad.
When it comes to using the bathroom, I hover squat over the toilet…IF I use it. I just use the toilet while I’m at school or at Starbucks mostly. The sink is disgusting, so I use the kitchen sink in my apartment to wash my hands and brush my teeth.
The worst part is the shower. This is a shared bathroom for 3 apartments within the building with 5 adults living there and for the shower to work it charges €2 for 5 minutes.
1) I need to take more than 5 minutes in the shower just for my hair alone. So in order for me to be truly cleansed, I would say I’m spending upwards of €6 per shower.
2) I bathe everyday, because I sweat profusely and I walk around in city pollution. €6 daily adds up big time. I’m looking at €168 monthly just to take a shower.
3) Since living in film and funk gives me anxiety, my family and I established that it would be cheaper to pay for a gym membership and use the shower there. Right now I’m on a student contract (3 month intervals) with a really posh gym in the city for only €45 per month.
So I’m taking advantage of my new membership by using the facilities for more than just hygiene purposes. I’m seriously out of shape and even though I lost a little weight since I got here, it wasn’t significant enough for me to buy new clothes or look better in photos. This is a good thing. I worked out after school today for 30 minutes and was already super winded. I’m now motivated to workout every day until that no longer is an issue. Hopefully I drop a few more pounds and gain some energy back.
Oh and I took a super long shower too.