Ok dammit, I guess I can’t stay away. I NEED to journal this.
So, today was my first class and well…it was somewhat frustrating, but I guess the first day of school is always frustrating. There’s still a lot of issues, confusion, and concern in regards to my major, but that’s beside point of this blog post.
Today we did a review of the Meisner repeat technique. Something I’m familiar with since I began training in Meisner back in 2015. The point of this technique is to break down any tension and barriers between the actors to find truthful moments. In essence it helps the actors deliver the text they’re given more realistically without over acting, or forcing oneself to dredge up past traumas for realistic emotions. We start by making simple observations first: noticing eye color or what shirt a person is wearing and we make a statement.
“You’re eyes are blue.”
Then the actor sitting opposite responds by repeating the statement
“My eyes are blue.”
From there we dig deeper and try to identify discomfort, or further details about the physical things that we see. What we can’t do is make a judgment. I can’t say “you’re wearing an ugly shirt” as opposed to saying “your shirt has lots of colors in it.”
Once we reach the the advanced stage, we begin by sitting in silence, make an observation, repeat the observation, and sit in silence once again. There’s also a balance of power that comes into play, meaning one person can’t make all the observations while the other repeats. The partner I had seemed to struggle with making observations, which is how we ended up in a staring contest much like the GIF I used above. After we finished the exercise, our professor asked why we reached a stalemate? My partner responded by saying he had so much to say but not sure how to phrase it. Um, ok. I’m going to pass it off as him being young and unfamiliar with the brutal honesty that comes with this practice, and his politeness was kicking in.
Now I’m left wondering what was on his mind
Ok, ok. One more post before going off the grid for a bit.
Currently I’m writing this post from a coffee shop in City Centre Dublin. My flight landed in Dublin Airport at the buttcrack-of-dawn this morning. The airplane seating was a little tight. I know good and well that paying economy prices usually means less than favorable seating with domestic flights; however, I was quite surprised that my international flight was the same way. Previously I have flown to England and Japan with a little wiggle room, so I expecting the same with this flight. There were still in-flight films provided and it gave me a chance to rewatch ‘Black Panther’ and ‘Avengers: Infinity War.’ It took up most of my flight time which was great.
Once I arrived, I called my mom to let her know that I arrived safely. After that, I had to get approved for student status at the immigration booth. Super easy process.
The real panic came when one of my bags did not arrive in baggage claim. Of course it’s the one bag with all of my underwear and my coat in it (SMH). I started to get nervous. I went to baggage claim only to find a long line with other passengers from my same flight. The employees knew something was up and asked the people doing the unloading of the bags if they possibly placed bags from our flight in the wrong receiving bin. That was exactly what happened and we managed to recover our bags. (Thank goodness!)
Once I exited the terminal, it was chilly. A huge difference from the 100 degree hellscape I just left from. Not really a complaint, but more of a shock to the system. From Summer to Winter in a blink of the eye.
I took the shuttle bus from the airport to the area where I’m staying and got a little confused as to which direction I’m supposed to be heading. An older gentleman saw that I looked lost and asked me where I’m going. Once I told him it was easy for him to figure out. He also asked me where I was coming from, I said the United States and the first thing that came out of his mouth was “You didn’t vote for HIM did you?” I chuckled at the fact that no one, myself included, will refer to my country’s awful leader by name. I replied “Absolutely Not!” to which he replied “Good for you!” A great first few hours in Dublin so far. 😂
As I mentioned in my previous post, I’m taking less time on social media, but I will definitely be back to report on the upcoming ‘Hamlet’ production with Ruth Negga.
For now, I’m just killing time until I can check in to my accommodation and take a much needed nap.
Just a couple of more weeks before I jet off to another land. I’m a roller coaster of emotions, but I will be alright. The big stuff is still yet to come:
•Having all of the necessary documents
A couple of things about this move are making me a little nervous. For starters, even though I have proof of acceptance to the school, medical insurance, money for cost of living, a valid passport, and accommodation, the immigration officer is well within their rights to block me from entering the country. I’m a U.S. Citizen, and unfortunately my country is not in good standing with the world right now. This is a valid reason to not permit me to study in Ireland.
The other concern is when I get there, will I be approved to work part-time? When meeting with the second round of immigration officers, I have to prove my finances by way of bank statements and additional income. I really NEED to work while I’m there. My family is not rich and we still have a slew of money issues.
I’m trying to hope for the best though.
As of right now, my notices were put in for work and next week is my final week at two of my three jobs. The last one I’m working all the way until it’s time for me to jet off. I have no idea how I’m going to pull it all off, but I’m going to make it happen.
Cruel fate, why do you do this to me?! There is a new movie being shot in Philadelphia that is backed by the Russo Brothers and stars Chadwick Boseman called ’17 Bridges.’ It starts filming late September after I leave for Dublin.
This would have been to closest I’ve ever been to work with people from Marvel (besides Creed 2 and the Wizard World Convention a couple of years ago.) I am sad and will have to live vicariously through my friends who will undoubtedly be working on this project.
Welp, it’s not Sunday. Not only did I fail to post ‘Work Update pt. 2’, but I also didn’t post a new episode of ‘Save the Drama for Your Shamma’. My apologies it’s been a long week.
Here are the updates:
•I lost one of my shifts at the restaurant, which sucks because I was starting to build up some more cash. It also came at a time where I did get a windfall of money from my Grandfather to complete my move to Dublin; however, having extra padding is super helpful. I’m going to put in my resignation notice soon anyway, so there’s no use in complaining about it now.
•Other particulars for school have been in place for a while now with the exception of student accommodation. Mainly because I’m not using student financial aid and paying on my own instead. This means I have to find my own accommodation and it’s been difficult. Dublin is one of the hardest cities to find housing. There are plenty of apartments I could live in…if I was wealthy. Unfortunately I don’t have that kind of money to live in one of those spaces so it looks like my first semester may be spent living in a hostel.
•I WILL have a new episode of ‘Save the Drama for Your Shamma’ tomorrow and again on Sunday. I just had to get my life together in the meantime.
That’s all for now. I hope to have better news next time.
Well…two of my three jobs went from certain to uncertain.
Tomorrow, I have a staff meeting at my theatre gig because of a massive management overhaul. While I can’t disclose everything that happened, just know the events leading up to this meeting have not been good. The meeting itself doesn’t feel promising either.
My restaurant job has welcomed back the woman who trained me. I’m happy for her because I didn’t want her to go, but it does mean I may be losing out on that extra income now. Right when I have a month left before leaving for Ireland. IF that even happens.
I have a theory and it’s been a theory since my financial aid was rescinded last year….I don’t think I’m meant for this school. My family doesn’t want to hear that and they keep pressing to make it a thing; though I am still woefully unprepared to live there financially. Not to mention the fact that some things career wise are now falling into place for me right as I’m supposed to be leaving. I mean, if I was in Ireland last year, I wouldn’t have been able to earn eligibility into SAG, because I would have been over the Atlantic and in school.
Education is important however. Not having a degree has hindered me from taking financially secure jobs over the years that are not retail, restaurant, or even human resources; which I was lucky to land the position I did without the degree. Mainly because I worked my way up that company and my friend was in a position to hire me.
This is one of those times when I have to exercise faith in the Universe over where it wants me to go. My biggest prayers are to let go of the things, situations, and people who no longer serve my highest good. For my family to truly support my career and to stop letting fear get in the way which, I feel was causing a lot of blockages in my career (among other things.) Finally, to be put in a position where I can excel at my career (may be simple as a workshop that helps me be a better actor compared to 4 years in school.)
I shall see what happens in the next few days.
(Source: Yuri!!! On Ice, Mitsurou Kubo.)
This morning I received an invite to audition for a role on an indie film that would be shooting next month. The timing comes right after I complain about my career going stagnant, which now renders that post null and void.
There’s no guarantee that I will get the part, however, the fact that the director reached out to me is important.
So what is the film?
It’s about a young woman who has major relationship failures with except for a meaningful relationship with another woman in her early twenties. I was offered to play one of the supporting roles in this film. The best part is, it’s a paying role too.
YES. This is the dream. To play a speaking part in a film or television show and actually getting compensated for it.
The only issue is that the schedule may roll into when I’m supposed to leave the country. Who knows what will happen, but it’s an opportunity I feel I couldn’t turn down. Prayers and fingers crossed for the best possible outcome.
(Taken yesterday at the Kleinlife Center in Northern Philadelphia.)
Yesterday, one of my students performed in the local pole dancing competition. She had wanted to compete for some time now so she took a brave step and signed up.
She choreographed her own routine and did not ask us for any input. The result was a marvelous! She also placed 4th in her division. Not bad for a first-timer huh?!
More so than that, I was inspired. For years I was a competition cheerleader and loved the thrill of preparing for a competition whether we won or not. It’s the same thrill I get when preparing for a show…which is also why I’m feeling a little empty about my career right now.
I have done pole comps in the past, but they were significantly smaller in comparison to yesterday’s, and that isn’t even the largest.
My goal is to compete as a way of getting out of my rut. I think focusing on my career too much can actually be detrimental rather than helpful.
Hopefully there is a small comp in Europe that would allow me to perform.
(Source: Meanwhile in Philadelphia Facebook Page.)
I’ve been sighing a lot lately. There has been a lot of motion without progress and I find myself super depressed. The Manhattan Monologue Slam didn’t net me much but an invite to the Philly Slam (which I’m still going to.) Still, I’m just a little disappointed on how few my bookings have been in New York and how few and far in between they have been in Philadelphia. However, they are my closest market and if I want to build up my resume at a lower cost, Philadelphia is where I will remain. The question now is, what’s out there?
The last panel of agents I auditioned for in Philly was a total bomb. Now with my new eligibility status with SAG, they wouldn’t be able to represent me at this point in time anyway. Once again I feel like I’m stuck without any prospect of a breakthrough. I was seriously hoping for that one good booking before starting school, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.
(Photo taken last night on the red carpet at BMCC Tribeca PAC.)
Last night was my last shift at the festival. It was another star studded event featuring the film ‘Disobedience’, starring Rachel Weisz and Rachel McAdams. Both Rachels wore lovely gowns for the premiere and were absolutely stunning. It’s funny, now that I’ve have seen so many celebrities in passing, I’m compelled to get into better shape; though I don’t aim to be, nor could I be as thin as they are. My wish is to make my body better than what it is right now.
So the big post-festival question is: where do I go from here? I’ve already talked about my need to perform again. Yes, that has to happen before I sink further into depression and outdate my résumé. I’m thinking about doing some more training in my field, like an audition workshop, dialect course, or on-camera acting course. Something to get back into the flow. The voiceover project is coming along slowly, but I should have some better news about that later on this week.
I will say, this whole experience has motivated me to further work on my craft.