My Career Is Stagnant At The Moment…

(Taken late last month.)

There’s not much I can do about it. What I can do is take stock of where I’m at now:

•SAG eligible

•A decent theatre resume

•A film credit

•Nominated for a regional award

That’s what I have for the time being, though I managed to get this done at a rapid pace of 3 years (SAG alone takes some people a decade.)

Right now, the only thing I have going on is my YouTube channel until I work another film in 2019. I’ll try to keep this page updated on any industry related things that may come up in the meantime.

Poor Casting Choice

(Source: Mean Girls, Paramount Pictures.)

Everyone is up in arms about Scarlett Johansson playing a trans man in her newest film. This, coming after the backlash of whitewashing the role of Motoko Kusanagi from ‘Ghost in the Shell.’ I don’t dislike her, though there are some things about her association with Woody Allen to be problematic. I don’t think this role is right for her.

Before I go any further, let me admit that I have played roles that did not fit my cultural background, gender, sexual orientation, or age group. If an actor does their job well, then you should know them by the role they embody more than the person themselves. However, Scarlett Johansson has reached the point in several of her roles where she is “Scarlett” in a film, and not the character she is playing. Therefore, the character of Dante Gill will not be portrayed correctly.

Now if it were up to me to find an actual trans man, who looks like Gill, and can act, that would be my preference. It’s a challenge, however, since I would have an extremely small pool to work from. The closest I would be able cast is Lea DeLaria from ‘Orange is the New Black.’

The biggest issue I have with casting films in Hollywood is the cronyism associated with it. In this case Ms. Johansson is working with the same director from ‘GITS’, which is pissing people off further (myself included.) I get it: if you want to work consistently, it’s best to build a strong network and work with many of the same people. Roles like Gill need a little more thought and use of common sense before calling up your homie to take the part….

But I digress.

Pole Competition

(Taken yesterday at the Kleinlife Center in Northern Philadelphia.)

Yesterday, one of my students performed in the local pole dancing competition. She had wanted to compete for some time now so she took a brave step and signed up.

She choreographed her own routine and did not ask us for any input. The result was a marvelous! She also placed 4th in her division. Not bad for a first-timer huh?!

More so than that, I was inspired. For years I was a competition cheerleader and loved the thrill of preparing for a competition whether we won or not. It’s the same thrill I get when preparing for a show…which is also why I’m feeling a little empty about my career right now.

I have done pole comps in the past, but they were significantly smaller in comparison to yesterday’s, and that isn’t even the largest.

My goal is to compete as a way of getting out of my rut. I think focusing on my career too much can actually be detrimental rather than helpful.

Hopefully there is a small comp in Europe that would allow me to perform.

Big Things In The Works!!!

(Taken Monday after my epiphany.)

While I was rambling on one of my Instagram stories (saved in the highlights) about one of the films we showed at work: I thought about vlogging film and television reviews. A friend of mine suggested I use a separate platform as to not disrupt my current social media brand. Well that sparked something.

Currently I have an active YouTube channel that I use specifically for self-tape auditions. Since those links are usually private, I don’t have other content posted for the public to view. Until now.

Posting reviews is hardly anything new and there is plenty of competition out there for me. However, I just want a platform to air my grievances at other people over what I should actually be doing myself…work in the film industry. That is the premise. You are going to watch an actress who is also trained in the technical side of film, bitch and complain about why the production was bad, while also praising what’s good about it.

Don’t expect it to be comedic. Comedy is a precious skill afforded to few and its not my forte. My biggest hope is that it’s relatable and informative. Just like my blog.

I’m excited aren’t you?

Second Chance

(Source: Sailor Moon, Toei Animation. Creator Naoko Takeuchi.)

Remember two weeks ago when I submitted my information to a high level mover and shaker in the industry? That gig they advertised has come and gone with me not working on it, but they advertised another casting call scheduled for this week.

As always, I strike while the iron is hot with this strike leading to some success! I got a call back for a live audition.

This gig may also not be for me, however, I will definitely be on their radar for any future project.

The other rumor about this individual…they may be able to represent talent. Ultimately that is my goal: to get representation, bigger parts, and more work. Wish me luck!

I Didn’t Get It

(Source: Facebook. I think that is the artist’s watermark on the bottom of the card but reverse searches yielded no results. Instead I’m just sharing where I found it.)

I didn’t land the gig that was shooting today. Which means I work at my day job today… yay.

I’m bummed, but not hurt. In this industry you have to be prepared for a lot of rejection and very limited success. Still, I’m grateful for getting an initial response.

I’m on this person’s radar now.

THIS wasn’t the project for me, but maybe a future one will be. We shall see.

Another Work Day and Maybe Some Good News

(Source: @witsandsass IG)

I’m seriously dragging today on my way to work. While this place is honoring my schedule and paying me, there are still problems. One, I’m paying too much money to get there as opposed to the job I truly wanted which was down the street from my house. Two, I’m still seeing some of the weirdness from this job.

(Source: Facebook.)

To top it off, it isn’t over yet. I have one more shift tomorrow, that is if I make it until then. Nothing bad though. Just an opportunity that may force me to take a leap of faith. That leap would be well worth me losing my job. Especially since my patience for nonsense is extremely limited.

(Source: someecards.com and On Stage Blog. I enjoy working in the shadows lol!)

I got a response for a project that would be filming tomorrow at the same time I’m supposed to work. There’s no confirmation if I am going to be working on this project in any fashion. So far I had to submit more information, my résumé, photos, social media handle, and my location.

What I’m hoping for is to work on the project regardless of whether I’m acting (which is what I originally submitted for) or crew (which I added I could do too.) The reason why this is such a big deal: the person who is coordinating the project is attached to a major super star right now, working in the depths of the industry.

Much like my time at Tribeca Film Festival, this is an opportunity to build my résumé and make connections. I have to prove myself worthy for this gig and I hope that they are willing to work with me.

Manhattan Monologue Slam

(Source: Thespian Peacock Tumblr and Pinterest.)

I got a last minute invite to the Manhattan Monologue Slam. Believe it or not, I have never heard of this showcase until a couple of weeks ago. One of the background actresses I met on the set of Creed 2 was inviting a group of us to be a part of the Philadelphia branch of this project. They weren’t able to pull off the May start date like they wanted, so instead we were invited to the original in NYC.

They only give us 30 seconds of time to perform a monologue. If they like us, we can move on to a bigger event where we would perform a 1-2 minute monologue. Either way it is a good event to attend as there are agents, celebrities, casting directors, and a slew of creatives in the audience watching you. The event itself is great for networking.

My biggest hope is to perform the monologue all the way through. I chose a brief part from the play ‘Carmilla’ that I was in as that would be most comfortable for me. The last time I attempted to perform one, I bombed it and had a panic attack during my audition for ‘Twelfth Night.’……………………………………………………………Please Jesus, see me through this.

Cliché Dream

(Source: Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh.)

You know that dream that everyone has once in their lives? The one where you show up to take a test you didn’t study for?

I had that, but instead, I wasn’t prepared for a show and my director admonished me for it.

The funny thing is it started out with the director giving me the script and said come in for tomorrow for the first rehearsal. I did that and the first rehearsal ended up being the show instead. I asked for the cast to take a vote because they were more prepared than I was, if they wanted me to leave. They preferred that I face my shame and go on with the performance like normal.

My dream basically set me up to fail and I wondered what this meant in my conscious life. No production would ever run this way, but it is a common dream amongst many of us. Is the unpreparedness a signal that we are on the wrong path? Like if we were given a quiz or a script we didn’t prepare for, is the dream telling us that we are not prepared for an important moment in our lives.

For me I’m going to say yes.

I’m trying extra hard to do the right thing, taking on extra jobs, setting myself up for success in Ireland, but something in my gut is screaming “WRONG WAY!!!” My only hope is to figure out the right way soon, so I’m not wasting my time.

HAMLET AHHH!

(Source: Facebook.)

I’ve mentioned more than once that I have yet to see a live performance of Hamlet. Some good news was delivered to me, by way of Shakespeare Magazine, as they announced a new production of Hamlet at the Gate Theatre in Dublin.

This run with Ruth Negga as the lead, coincides perfectly with my move to Dublin. The tickets are a decent price too. My butt will be in a seat, late September for this production!