Good news, I’m now working with the industry insider that I wanted to work with. Because she is such an insider, I’m bound by an NDA so I won’t be able to post about my job. What I can talk about is one struggle associated with my job:
Word processing software.
Not necessarily the software in general, but the version that is downloaded on my laptop…it’s giving me serious hell! It took me nearly 2 hours to get one document done due to tabs being missing on this version without an option to download. I’m super pissy about it because I want to do well and not look like a total idiot.
When I go home tonight, I’m going to play around with it a bit more to see if I can correct the problems before Monday.
The above picture is me internally screaming.
Well it’s because I ran into the industry insider that I want to work with, and the situation was so awkward that now I just want to hide. Here’s the backstory:
I mobile ordered food from Starbucks and went to the cafe I normally go to, to pick it up. I walk in the building and she is there fixing her coffee. I walk past her trying to avoid eye contact because, 1) I just woke up and I look rough, 2) I didn’t want her to think I was just in there to follow her. Still as I turned around from the pickup bar, food in hand, we made eye contact. I mustered a smile even though I died inside, grabbed some napkins and rolled out as quickly as I could. Later I saw her post an Instagram story of her pulling up to the cafe shortly before I got there…
Now I look REALLY suspicious for being in the same place at the same time.
Just put me out of my misery now. 😔
(Source: Student Problems Facebook.)
One. More. Class.
Then I fly out on Tuesday morning back to the United States, and not a moment too soon. To say this semester kicked my ass is an understatement. Yes, it did improve, and so did I. However, the steps it took to get here were super treacherous. This trip back home will be a bit of a reprieve.
There are some updates I wanted to include in this post that I talked about in recent days:
• I’m no longer in the professor’s course that disrespected me in front of the entire class. I had to take the case up with the head of my major’s department and the academic dean to move me out of his class. I was moved to a different professor’s course where I’m ACTUALLY LEARNING my craft and it’s not being treated like a contestant for the teacher’s favorite student. The original professor still infuriates me. Not only in how he treated me, but the rumblings I’m hearing from how he is treating the other students. It also doesn’t help that he’s industry (working actor) too. If I ever have to work with him in a professional setting and he is disrespectful to me again, I hope I will be in a position of power by that point in time to call him out on his bullying instead of taking myself out of the situation like I did in class; which made me feel powerless. I suspect that is what he wanted all along. To make me feel powerless. He is a bully after all.
• The classmate finally came around and contributed the bare minimum to the group project and no need to “correct” my paper. Between my friend who also worked on the project calling them out their lack of effort and my email, it seems that kicked them in the pants enough to do some work. I hope to never have to work on another project with them ever again.
• The short film I worked on is coming together fast! We only shot it this past Wednesday and there is already a rough cut that was sent to the directors and the producer/writer of the production. Soon I hope to use some of the footage for my own show reel. Finally a friggin reel. It’s all coming together.
Aside from the updates, I managed to book another fit modeling gig back home and apply for some mini gigs. I’m also teaching at the dance studio this month starting next Thursday. My reprieve will be a bit busy, a bit profitable, and most of all it will be at home. I can’t wait!
(Source: Student Problems Facebook.)
It’s the last week of the semester, and, like always, there is fuckery afoot. There are a couple of projects that involve groups that I’m a part of, that are due this week. One of the projects in particular is close to bringing out “HR/Corporate Shamma.”
Why? Well, one individual in particular who has:
•Not consistently attended class.
•Not answer questions when asked on the group chat.
•Only wants to participate in the project according to their own terms and not the requirements of our professor. (Meaning they want to delegate all of the tasks to everyone else and do nothing themselves.)
Now has the absolute gall to send me an email requesting to forward all of my work to them, in order to make “corrections.”
They already showed their ass from the start when when they tried to accuse another student in the class of being flaky; when in fact the accuser is flaky as hell! Second of all…corrections? For what? They weren’t in class when all of the notes were taken and the professor knows I’m writing the paper. He has a keen idea on who’s been putting in work and who has not, so any “corrections” this person has to make is a desperate attempt to look like they did something.
Another point I want to add, is the background of this individual. Like me, they came from a previous profession (not corporate) before diving into Drama School. Which means they are also carrying a massive ego by thinking they are better than the other students here. But here’s the rub: the class we have this project for, is more suited to my previous industry than theirs. It’s the reason why I’m writing the report in the first place. Also, while my previous profession has been pivotal in how I navigate this industry, I’m not shitting on the other students for not having those skills. Instead I’m offering them up to be used to get us the best grade possible.
These skills are going to be dusted off, again, for the most scathing corporate email I can possibly write to this classmate. Including a corporate jargon way of conveying they are not getting my notes and go to hell.
I just had a long talk with my friend and classmate about memorization. Namely, we’re memorizing too many different texts. Since we have 10 classes, each class offers something different:
•A scene from an Irish play for Monday’s class.
•A piece of text from “The Tell Tale Heart” for the Tuesday morning class.
•A Shakespeare monologue for the Tuesday afternoon class.
•A scene from an Irish television show for Wednesday’s class.
•2 songs off book for vocal rep.
And that’s only this week.
Memorization is incredibly helpful, and over time, with enough training, I can memorize quickly. However, with stress, a varied schedule, and too many texts to learn, I’m far too scattered. With the way my brain works, I need to dedicate more time to learn a show or a piece of text than maybe the average person.
I pray to survive the semester with all of my texts in place. But I wish I could dedicate myself to one piece of text at a time.
(Source: Image Orca Pinterest.)
Is it possible for a scam to bring people together? In my case and many others, yes it did.
A “recruiter” messaged me a few weeks ago to tell of a a beauty campaign featuring diverse faces and body types for a campaign. I was wary of it at first, but I was also wary of a strange email sent to me about a film (MUDA) that turned out to be very real. So I asked for more information and they sent me an email regarding what the campaign is and what the contract looks like.
Before I agree to anything, I typically do research to find out more about the companies involved as well as the campaign. Shockingly these scammers did an incredible job at crossing their “T’s” and dotting their “I’s”. They provided real companies, real discount codes for their products, a genuine conference call with everyone that would be working on the shoot, as well as a real location as to where we would be staying. Unfortunately, but fortunately, the veil lifted for everyone soon after and it was revealed to be a scam.
The silver lining in all of it was that everyone scammed was on a group email and we all corresponded with each other after the big reveal to figure out how we can fight the scam and stay in touch. Now we are a community that follows each other on Instagram with the hopes that we will collaborate on projects in the future. It’s definitely possible: many of us are models, actors, recording artists, bloggers, and brand ambassadors. Movers and shakers in this industry that are making big things happen.
I’ve been fortunate enough to not be pulled into an elaborate scam that affects my safety or my finances. Those people are out there and it’s concerning that they would go to such lengths. Take this as a warning: do all of your research, ask questions, ask others that are involved, and if something doesn’t feel right in your gut, walk away.
(Source: Student Problems, Facebook.)
It’s officially day 1 of my week break with the school…it was needed.
An incident happened with the professor I was beginning to have conflict with that left me angry, in tears, and pretty much left the classroom never to return. I reported the incident to the head of the department and we are trying to find a way for me to still earn the credit without returning to that class. I will share more about what happened on Thursday and Friday after the break because it’s an ongoing issue that keeps spiraling.
For now, I have a ton of assignments to complete before the week is over:
•Reciting a monologue in Standard British
•Completing an essay for music theatre history class.
•Do research for event management class
•Practice my comedic Shakespeare monologues for one of my acting classes and read the two books that professor required us to read over the break.
•Learn a scene from an Irish play for my other acting professor.
•Last, but not least, watch a handful of movies and submit a side I created for acting on screen class.
It’s a lot and somehow I’m supposed to fit a social life in this week as well. Time to get to work.
I know the meme I’m including above has a sour face, but I promise it’s not in relation to the Entertainment or Fashion industry being more inclusive in general. The face is directed towards people begging certain outlets to be more inclusive where as they have historically shown themselves not to be. Primarily the Victoria’s Secret fashion show and The Academy Awards (even though they are making an attempt.)
I read an article from Teen Vogue about Rihanna’s SavageXFenty runway show last week. The headline said “it was everything that Victoria’s Secret runway show should be.” My question is why? They don’t even make inclusive sizes for women like myself. Plus the quality of the garments is so crappy, that I would prefer if this company just fades away into obscurity. (I used to work there so I know.)
We need to stop asking for a seat at the table where we are not wanted. Instead pour as much money into companies who do celebrate us, like SavageXFenty, to make bigger and better shows with dazzling collections year after year.
Ok, ok. One more post before going off the grid for a bit.
Currently I’m writing this post from a coffee shop in City Centre Dublin. My flight landed in Dublin Airport at the buttcrack-of-dawn this morning. The airplane seating was a little tight. I know good and well that paying economy prices usually means less than favorable seating with domestic flights; however, I was quite surprised that my international flight was the same way. Previously I have flown to England and Japan with a little wiggle room, so I expecting the same with this flight. There were still in-flight films provided and it gave me a chance to rewatch ‘Black Panther’ and ‘Avengers: Infinity War.’ It took up most of my flight time which was great.
Once I arrived, I called my mom to let her know that I arrived safely. After that, I had to get approved for student status at the immigration booth. Super easy process.
The real panic came when one of my bags did not arrive in baggage claim. Of course it’s the one bag with all of my underwear and my coat in it (SMH). I started to get nervous. I went to baggage claim only to find a long line with other passengers from my same flight. The employees knew something was up and asked the people doing the unloading of the bags if they possibly placed bags from our flight in the wrong receiving bin. That was exactly what happened and we managed to recover our bags. (Thank goodness!)
Once I exited the terminal, it was chilly. A huge difference from the 100 degree hellscape I just left from. Not really a complaint, but more of a shock to the system. From Summer to Winter in a blink of the eye.
I took the shuttle bus from the airport to the area where I’m staying and got a little confused as to which direction I’m supposed to be heading. An older gentleman saw that I looked lost and asked me where I’m going. Once I told him it was easy for him to figure out. He also asked me where I was coming from, I said the United States and the first thing that came out of his mouth was “You didn’t vote for HIM did you?” I chuckled at the fact that no one, myself included, will refer to my country’s awful leader by name. I replied “Absolutely Not!” to which he replied “Good for you!” A great first few hours in Dublin so far. 😂
As I mentioned in my previous post, I’m taking less time on social media, but I will definitely be back to report on the upcoming ‘Hamlet’ production with Ruth Negga.
For now, I’m just killing time until I can check in to my accommodation and take a much needed nap.
(Source: Chappelle Show, Comedy Central.)
A lot has happened over the weekend and unfortunately it left me with a lot of anger and grief. I got into a Twitter argument with someone that I liked and respected and ended up being labeled a horrible human being en masse.
I still stand by my statement because there were no ill intentions on my end. But it reminds me that I have a pattern of dealing with the same type of people when I get into disagreements online. So I figure maybe I’m not great at communicating whether it’s in spoken form or written form.
Because of this, I cleaned up my blog of anything I think could be taken the wrong way. Deleting posts. Cleaning up the language of some. I just noticed not every photo was sourced, so that’s a silver lining. I may change some of the photos too.
It’s not going to completely stop arguments from happening, or people loathing me. However, it is what I need to do to make the moment right.
But I may just go off the grid period. Not only because this was an unwinnable situation, but also due to one of the responses directed at me was super racist. Being misunderstood and not being able to fight back because I’m already written off and would be perceived as “grasping at straws” is aggravating.